PREVIOUS YEARS ENTRIES FROM THE DIARY:

JANUARY 2004

Friday 30/01/2004

The Jolly Boys Outing was great! See it in pictures on its very own page.

Following on from the success of our joint venture with N31l Presents on the Christmas Lunch, another investigation is well being planned at the moment, and a possible challenge for all you fans out there. Also, we might be teaming up with Burgess Hill Sucks to cause a little chaos at an up-and-coming Martlets Hall event. So watch this space!

It was Thursday yesterday, and I can't think of anything eventful happening. Oh wait! Due to the icy conditions, I decided to be a gentleman by walking a certain lady home. With my shoes having about as much grip as a worn out tyre, I managed to get nearly all the way without falling. Until that fateful moment, when I lost my grip, my legs shot up in the air and I ended up falling ass over tit onto the ice. Needless to say, my acquaintance found it rather amusing.

It's been an eventful day really. Started this morning with a legendary Wilmore lesson. Finished this afternoon with a wonderful game of football with Mr Franks on the field.

Below is the quote of the day, which does infact come from Franksy himself:

QUOTE OF THE DAY: After a muddy game on the field, we returned in. However, the changing rooms are locked. Phil shouts: "Sir, can we have the keys?" The response isn't what was expected, as Franksy shouts angrily: "I told you to remind me fellas!" When nobody says they'll go and get them, he shouts more angrily: "I SAID I TOLD YOU TO REMIND ME FELLA'S." Miss Stanton comes to the rescue, unlocking the boys changing room with her keys, while a disgruntled Mr Franks puts his boots back on and trudges back out to find his keys.

Talking of PE staff and quotes, here's a classic from a while back, featuring the double act that has been likened to Laurel and Hardy, The Two Ronnie's and Morecambe and Wise. It could only be Vincent and Stanton:

• Mr Vincent: One of the options is relaxation classes with Miss Stanton. Do you wanna explain what they are?

• Miss Stanton: OK. Well, relaxtion classes are basically..............classes in which you relax

• Mr V: It's not a dos though, is it?

• Miss S: A what?

• Mr V: A dos

• Miss S: A dog?

• Mr V: NO, A DOS!

The Laurel and Hardy of the teaching world.......its Vincent and Stanton!

Tuesday 27/01/2004 - 1 DAY TO GO!

Worst night in history of sleepless nights last night. After constantly blowing my nose to relieve a snot blockage, I gave up and headed downstairs. I got some of this stuff which is supposed to clear it, but it was about as helpful as an inflatable dartboard. In desperation, I discovered some of this Calpol stuff. I think it's designed for kids, but its not usual medicine. It actually tastes good! After 2 little spoonfuls, I headed back up to bed and slept like a log. The morale: If you can't sleep, have Calpol! It's the Rolls Royce of medicines

Today has been eventful. Someone pulled down a board in T Block during our IT lesson. This prompted the quote of the day, which can be found further down. I have decided on my subject for my speech in English: The Advantages of Shopping in Charity Shops. I shall let you know the outcome when it is done. Enjoyed lunch with Mr Fenton Vince, who confirmed that he is almost certainly going on the Jolly Boys Outing tomorrow. Excitement is growing, and I am already urinating on the floor just thinking about it! Here is the line-up that will be going on the outing:

• Scott McCarthy (Chairman, McCarthy Industries. Original Jolly Boy)

• Chris Traylen (Original Jolly Boy)

• Phil Durrant (Original Jolly Boy)

• Lewis Trower (Blue Mayhem Guitarist, Member of the Year 11 Pictorial Team)

• Neil Gingell (Owner, N31L Presents, Member of the Year 11 Pictorial Team and Christmas Dinner Investigator)

• Lucy Hole (Original Photographer of the Jolly Boys)

• Lauren Griffin (Head Girl, Oakmeeds Community College)

• Simon Taylor (Southdown Rovers FC, Golfing God)

• Ian Simpson (Southdown Rovers FC, Cricketing King)

• Plus some more who I'm not sure of! Including legendary teachers Mrs Bonner, Mrs Bishop and possibly a guest appearance by the one, the only, MR FENTON VINCE!

Myself, Mr Lewis Trower and Mr Chris Traylen were throwing a rubber duck around the playground today, which is perfectly in line with the rules. Only balls have been banned from the playground due to the building work, not rubber poultry! Check out the Pictorial for some fine pictures from today's tutorial, involving the bully Dean Faulkner.

QUOTE OF THE DAY: With a display board having been ripped down in T Block, we were questioned by a member of the Senior Management Team as to if we knew anything. At the end this person exclaimed: "Well if you happen to remember seeing anything, come and tell me". She then left the room, before the IT Guru Bert Lloyd exclaimed: "What does she mean! It's not like we're going to suddenly remember. We haven't got bloody amnesia!"

Monday 26/01/2004 - 2 DAYS TO GO!

I apologise for the recent lack of updates, but this has been due to a number of things:

• The fact that McCarthy Towers has upgraded its computer system, so all of the data had to be transferred

• Time has been divulged on the now-ready Fashion Guide, Christmas Dinner, and a number of other things

• I couldn't be bothered

However, there will be a great number of updates now, including the pictorial and the up and coming Jolly Boys Outing! How exciting. Maths Module test today, and I think I can safely say I surpassed myself by getting what I  can only believe to be another U. This is the most down I've felt since my last U in maths, which was about 2 weeks ago. I mean, who needs maths? It's not like you have to work out money to see if you've been cheated in real life, or work out how much petrol you need to get to a destination, or how many milligrams of a certain drug you need to stay alive, or how many litres of water you need to drink to stop getting dehydrated, or....., I'm going to shut up now before I make myself feel worse than I already do.

Since the last diary entry, I have also become addicted to tea. I can't stop drinking the damn stuff. On Friday, I ate a grand total of roughly 30 Halls Soothers in the space of 4 hours, due to the worst sore throat ever. I also became addicted to them, and would like to thank Steph Conway for giving me her last one today, and re-assure her that the secret is safe with me, and I haven't told anyone about her fancying................................................................. a new unicycle for her birthday! Haha! Had you going there, didn't I? I will also be captaining Caburn in the Oakmeeds Top House Quiz next monday against Firle, which should be if anything entertaining. Anyone who is going to be there is in for a real spectacle!

I was going to say something else, but its gone from me. So I'll leave it until tomorrow

Monday 19/01/2004

Monday it was today. Unfortunately, I have no photos for the pictorial, but it has been a rather entertaining day.

Right then. Myself, Lewis and Chris have been banned from the library, which is slightly unfortunate. Fear not though, we will risk live and limb to get back in there and get some footage. Myself and Lewes had a laughing fit today in B Block, causing most people to stare at us. However, it is rather personal what we were laughing at, and some people may say cruel, so I intend not to reveal it.

I would also like to apologise to Sailor for ruining his day. It started when I slapped him this morning, and finished when I opened his bag. He spun round to see what was happening, which flung his lunch box out of his bag into the mud, which caused him to drop his brand new ear thingies for his CD player, which caused him to almost lose his glove. So Sailor, I'm sorry! 

And here are a few quotes of the day!

• MRS DELLA SCALLA - GERMAN. Having just been told that she had lost someone's coursework, she responded with: "That's Bullshit"

• MR FRANKS AND MR SHAKESPEARE - LUNCH HALL. Having indulged in a lovely conversation with Mr Shakespeare about French cuisine, we were joined with Mr Franks and his plate of salad. Mr Shakespeare commented to Mr Franks: "Good to see you're eating healthy today Mr Franks", to which Mr Franks responded: "My body is a temple", which caused Mr Shakespeare to comment: "A rather worn temple, but nonetheless a temple". Franksy wasn't very happy with that!

• MYSELF AND MR GOACHER. Having gone through a rather hard maths question with a rather pissed off Mr G because of a lack of attention shown by the class, Mr G commented "It isn't rocket science now, is it?", to which I felt the need to respond: "It aint exactly baking a cake either". His mood didn't seem to improve!

Sunday 18/01/2004

Rather disappointing weekend. Brighton lost 2-1 to QPR, meaning I owed Chris a quid. Rather upsetting. However, today was a very good day! Southdown took on Lewes, who I'm lead to believe are one of the best sides in the county at under 16 level. So to lose only 3-0 was a great result, especially as it was 0-0 with only 15 minutes left on the clock.

This afternoon, I went and watched what I thought was going to be a crap pantomime put on by some Burgess Hill theater thingy. However, it actually turned out to be damn good. Which was suprising

Friday 16/01/2004

I can't think of anything interesting that has really happened this week. We have some more pics for the Pictorial, and Jamie has a page where we will exploit him for the lying birk he really is. Mock exams back, Math's was bad, with a U, but PE was good with an A*.

The Jolly Boys Outing is well underway planning wise! The 3 original Jolly Boys have all booked there places, which means myself, Phil and Chris will all be going. We will also be joined by original camera woman Lucy Hole, and we may also be joined by Lewis, and with a bit of persuasion Mr F-V!

Purchased some bird seed off of Steven Denver today. Jolly good fun. Spread around town to attract more wildlife to the area. Fire bells went off today at school, unfortunately you cannot hear them in certain areas of the school, which is a bit of a problem as everyone in T Block could've burned to death. Enjoyed a Mr Wilmore anecdote today as well! Went shopping with Mr Ali Magness, in which was, well, a different experience I suppose.

Plus, see my excellent interview on Fixturesman Website. Go to Articles or Literature. Peter Chapman has come up chumps with the site, its different gravy.

After capturing a picture of Miss Stanton, I exclaimed "excellent. I can put your head on a donkey now ma'am", to which she responded. "Really! Can you do that!" with a worrying amount of excitement. I have now been commissioned to place her head onto Claudia Schiffer bodies, or alternatively her on Miss Piggy and Mr Vincent on Kermit the Frog. I can see a potential money earner here!

Monday 12/01/2004

Nothing much happened yesterday, apart from Southdown getting a 4-4 draw with Sidley, the highlight of which was the double rainbow which appeared over Leylands in the first half. Magical!

But today! Where do we start! I'll get the boring bits out the way. Despite best efforts of the IT Guru Bert Lloyd, I made a complete pigs ear of the IT Exam. I Donald ducked up my German oral by learning the wrong stuff, and Maths isn't my strongest point, meaning a complete cock up in the test. And now for the exciting part!

Myself, Mr Chris Traylen and Mr Lewis Trower ventured into town after school. We ventured into Wilkinson, and who should be there, but Steven Denver! We decided to buy the most stupid item we could from him. After considering another dog bone or some rabbit food, Chris hit gold when he found a wonderful rubber chicken! On close investigation, Lewis found out not only was it a rubber chicken, but it squeaked! After a whole 5 minutes of playing with this chicken and non-stop laughter, I parted with £2 to purchase it. We couldn't resist, and after I placed on my old man hat, and Chris his bow tie, we took it to the till of Mr Steven Denver! Here Lewis handed over the money, and indulged in conversation with the Wilko worker, but the chicken wasn't happy. It took a valiant WWF style wrestling match for myself to try and keep it under control, and with a lot of shouts and squeaking, and at one point a small scuffle on an empty till, it was paid for and we were out of the shop, much to the amusement and confusion of other workes and customers in Wilkinson, as a bemused Steven Denver bid us farewell. And after being sedated, we got a picture of the wonderful chicken in its new home at McCarthy Towers. And here it is:

Saturday 10/01/2004

Dissapoitning day. Brighton drew 0-0 with Oldham in a boring game. 

Fun in KFC afterwards. With these new parking machines in Waitrose, you have to use a small chip to place in the machine. Well, my father wound down the car window, placed the chip in, and then it rolled out. Infact, it rolled away. This meant a frantic five minute search for the chip, which was eventually found having caused a small traffic congestion in the car park. In true Tom McCarthy fashion, he wasn't best please!

Friday 09/01/2004

Science and German exams, which I made a total balls up of. But oh well, what's the point in life if you can't fail? During the lunch break, myself, Mr Chris Traylen, Mr Phil Durrant, Mr Ashley Johnson and Mr Luke Kember enjoyed a trip into turn, including such landmarks as KFC and Wilkinson. Unfortunately, we did not encounter Steven Denver, so we were unable to purchase another stupid item from him.

After RE Exam, we yet again ventured into town, where myself and Mr Lewis Trower enjoyed a forage into Kadar to check out a rather dashing police womans uniform. Pictures courtesy of Dean Faulkner on the Year 11 Pictorial Page.

Good news this evening, as following on from Chris' idea of wearing a bow tie, I have myself found two rather dashing ones. Look out for a picture coming soon on the home page on the various new fashions for 2004 - if and when I can be bothered to produce it!

Thursday 08/01/2004

Not much happened yesterday, so I didn't bother with a diary entry. I got my barnet chopped, and spent all day over The Weald pub playing pool. I love study leave!

Today was what I would describe as a typical Scott McCarthy Day: everything that could possibly go wrong, went wrong. This morning, I declined a lift to my first exam, thinking it would be nice to experience some fresh air. I misjudged the strength of wind/rain, and ended up arriving at school wetter than a fish. Then, in English, this excess water got wiped all over my test, causing it to get wet and making the writing show through both sides of the paper. After the exam I arranged a deal with Mr Phil Durrant, whereby I borrowed his umbrella for my journey home as he was remaining in school. After five minutes, it had blown inside out twice, and come apart so two of the metal things were poking through the fabric. I paid him the cost of the damaged umbrella, all £3. Myself and my father went then went to Cuckfield to purchase a DVD player, after which his house keys went missing, causing a frantic search. They are still lost now, believed to be somewhere in the house. Apart from that, its been a pretty good day!

QUOTE THE DAY: This morning, I asked Sailor if he knew what hurt most in the boring rain and driving wind. He replied that he didn't, so I proceeded to slap him quite viciously around the cheek, before declaring 'a slap'. He was not amused, calling me a git and hitting me over the back of the head in a vicious and unprovoked attack.

Tuesday 06/01/2004

Today I gave Peter Chapman a bone. I thought that would get your attention! Myself and Mr Chris Traylen bough a dog bone in Wilkinson off Steven Denver, before myself and Mr Gwynne delivered to Chappers house. We hope his dog's liked it!

The day was eventful. English and RE exams went OK, although myself and Lewis couldn't contain our laughter when someone across, who turned out to be Sailor, was sneezing rather loudly. During the break between the two, myself and Chris headed back to the Traylen residence to enjoy a game of Red Card Soccer on the Game Cube, maily because we wanted to see a ref riving round in pain, and hear the voice of Chris Kamara on the commentary. Unfortuantely, he picked up 4 wins out of 4.

I am glad to report that I will be getting my barnet chopped tommorrow, and as of yet I'm not sure what to do have done with it. So you'll have to wait and see on that one! And here's todays wonderful picture:

SAILOR OFTEN LEAVES HIS FLAP OPEN FOR EXPOSURE

Monday 05/01/2004

Photographing of Oakmeeds started taking place today. All our images can be found on the Year 11 Pictorial page. Myself, Mr Lewis Trower, Mr Chris Traylen, Mr Dean Faulkner and Mr Neil Gingell promptly received library bans. However, fear not, we will be back! We also found an interesting game of A Question of Sport, which we intend to play by the end of the year.

After school had finished today, myself and Mr Elliot Gwynne were joined by Mr Chris Traylen for a spot of shopping. Elliot found an umbrella in a bin, which he kept. We found several baragins, with Chris purchasing a hat, Elliot purchasing a waist coat and I managed to pick up a new overcoat and a cane, both for £15. We then proceeded to walk home, although this wasn't before calling in on Peter Chapman. Unfortunately, there was no answer. It has been a momentus evening, as I also picekd up my first Sensible Soccer victory on the megadrive since re-purchasing it for £3 off e-bay. Malta outplaying Germany to win 2-0. I go to bed a happy man this evening!

Sunday 04/01/2004

An eventful weekend. Saturday there was no Brighton game. Bored stiff, my mother asked me to find a game that we could go to. So, it was with great excitement that we found ourselves at The Friends Provident St Mary's Stadium for Southampton v Newcastle FA Cup 3rd Round. Waiting outside, we had the fortune of bumping into not only Mr Gordon Strachan, but James Beatie, and the BBC TV crew of John Motson, Trevor Brooking, Gary Lineker and Peter Schimchel. Newcastle went onto win the game 3-0. And it was good to see that the Chinese/Japanese/Korean's have a good grasp of the English language, as the bloke next to me only said two words in English all day: Shit Man!

Onto Sunday, and it was time for me and the Bald Eagle to venture south to view Old Varndenians v Burgess Hill. The Hillians won 5-0, and to be honest with you it was a pretty crap game.

I also sliced part of thumb open while trying to open up a pen knife, which was kinda painfull and required a couple of plasters to stem the blood flow, which dripped over the kitchen worktop and has unfortunately left a small stain.

Friday 02/01/2004

Oh yes! Happy New Year to one and all! What a night it was. Visited some acquaintances in Worthing, and for once I managed to stay at there house without breaking anything! It was an achievement I'm extremely proud of! Hope everyone had a good one! Unfortunately, Peter Chapman's cones have had to be moved, as people entering and exiting McCarthy Towers kept walking into them. They are no sitting on the outside of the perimeter wall. I am unfortunatley in on this Friday evening due to being unwell - with what I believe to be a cold.

By the way, the diary now contains updates from the 16/12/03, as I couldn't be at all assed previously to update. But now we're back

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